as i got on the train home tonight, there were two guys arguing on the platform-something about a bass guitar. distracted, i ignored it and sat down, trying to get comfortable for the long ride back to queens. they got on the train, still arguing, and sat across from me. enter drunk girl. drunk girl veered over to the nearest pole, listened to the fight, which at this point had become a debate over who was the asshole. drunk girl took one look at the two guys and said, "let me tell you, you're both assholes."

the two guys each tried to convince her that, in fact, it was the other guy who was the real asshole, but drunk girl was having none of it. she managed to focus her eyes for a split second while she told them, "all guys are assholes. you're both screwed. you're both the asshole."

usually i hate drunk girls. i think i fell a little bit in love with this one.